Tour Time With Team Starkid
by TeamStarkidLove
Summary: Luna, Joe, and the rest of the Starkids are going on tour, and they run into some problems. Has nothing to do with Starship. Sequel to my other story, "Problems With Everything". Rated T because of some language. Hugs and Butterfly Kisses, The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar.
1. Fun Run Battle

Joe tried to focus. It was during tour rehearsals, and he was about to start a Fun Run battle for supremacy against Joey, JoMo, and Dylan. All around him, people were choosing sides and placing bets.

The game started. Joe started in last, got a saw and killed everyone to get to first. Next to him, Jaime screamed "Come on Joe! I'll bet if you win, Luna will kiss you!"

Luna, who had been reading off to the side, looked up at the sound of her name.

"Yeah!" Lauren yelled. "Winner gets a kiss from Luna!" Luna had realized what was going on, and looked scared out of her mind. Joe was determined to win now. Suddenly, he was hit with a knife. JoMo's panda character ran past.

"DAMN YOU MOSES! YOU'RE GOING DOWN!"

"Too late." JoMo had reached the finish line. Joe came in second, Dylan in a close third, and Joey finally finished after a long wait. JoMo grinned.

"I think I get my prize now. Luna? What do you think?"

Luna smiled evilly. "I never agreed to kiss the winner. You all made that up." Everyone groaned. Luna looked to Joe for support. Joe chuckled. This was the perfect revenge. Last week, Luna had pulled a prank on him, and now he was getting to get her back.

"Sorry, Luna. He beat me fair and square. Give him his prize." Joe watched as Luna's face showed her shock.

"Fine." she grumbled as she walked over to JoMo and pecked him on the cheek.

"That counts." Luna said before anyone could complain. She turned to Joe. "Thanks, dude."

Joe smiled innocently. "Karma's a bitch, sweetheart." Luna looked confused.

"What? What did I do?"

"You know. The whipped cream in the shoes prank, from last week."

"That wasn't me." Lauren giggled. Joe and Luna turned to face her.

"Lopez. That was you, wasn't it?" Joe sat calmly in his chair, but on the inside, he was fuming.

"Yup." Luna looked at her in awe.

"You actually did it? Without me?"

"Yup."

Joe glared at Lauren. "Lopez, you do realize what this means right?"

"Yes, I do."

Luna looked confused again. "What does this mean?"

Lopez laughed maniacally. "War."

**Author's Note: It might take me longer to update this story than it took me to update the last one. School started again. Ugh.**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	2. Let The War Commence!

**The next day**

Rehearsal was starting later in the day for the next few weeks, and Joe and Luna needed something to do. So they did the obvious. A Nerf gun war.

Everyone on the tour pitched in and got to work, putting black tape over the windows, hiding ammo, and turning out all the lights.

When all the lights were out and the house was as dark as it could get, the Starkids met up in the hallway outside the front door. Everyone now had a gun and a roll of duct tape.

"Alright. Rules if you are shot, act dead. If you are caught, they can and most likely will bind your hands and feet, plus gag you, so don't get caught. Teams are allowed. Stealing guns and ammo is allowed. If you are hit on the head with the back of the gun, you have been knocked out. Count slowly to at least five hundred before you wake up. Go!" Joe ran over to Luna to protect her. Joey, JoMo, and Dylan followed and the guys made a protective circle around her. Darren and Brian ran out of the room after teaming up, as did Jaime, Julia, and Tyler, Lauren and Meredith, and Matt and Nick.

Luna planned her strategy. Be on everyone's team, but no one's team. Act weak.

While the guys and Luna- Team RedVines, as Joey called them- tiptoed out of the room, Meredith and Lauren sneaked back into the room. They had been watching from the other room, and had made a plan of their own. Go for the weakling. They had seen the terrified look on Luna's face before she followed the guys out of the room. Team Megagirl followed in hot pursuit.

**Author's Note: Sorry for not uploading sooner. The next few chapters are all about the Nerf gun war. How Exciting! After that, real conflict will probably appear. I haven't written about the actual rehearsals yet, because I have absolutely no idea what happens at rehearsals. Sorry.**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	3. Eeeeeeevil Plaaaaans!

Luna stayed at the back of the group. She had a reason, though. She had heard someone following them, two someones whispering, and Lauren giggling. Knowing Lauren, she would go for the weakest people first. Luna planned her next move carefully. She bent down to tie her shoe and they attacked. She acted terrified as they pulled her into the next room. They pulled out their roll of duct tape and taped her feet together and her hands together. They then gagged her and prepared to go after the guys. Luna clapped as best she could with her taped hands. Lauren looked back, and Luna mimed taking off the gag. Meredith complied.

"Do you want to help me get revenge on Joe for the whole Fun Run thing?" Lauren looked at her curiously.

"You would get revenge on your own teammate?"

"I am on no one's team yet."

Lauren and Meredith looked at each other. "We're in. And you can consider yourself a part of Team Megagirl. What's the plan?"

Luna smiled and began to explain.

**Author's Note: Thank you to Magical-Carpet-Ride for following the story! I promise to try to update more often. Sorry.**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	4. Where's Luna?

The guys had been walking for about five minutes before stopping to do a head count. "Where's Luna?" The group looked frantically around until they heard Luna scream.

Joe wasted no time bolting down the hall towards the scream. He soon found her, standing against the wall, her hands and feet taped up, pointing a gun at Lauren and Meredith, her hands shaking. If Joe had been watching Lauren, he would have seen her wink at the other girls, but Joe had eyes only for Luna.

**Author's Note: OoOoO What's going on? Oh, that's right, you don't know. I do. MUAHAHAHA! Sorry. Well, not really. =P**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	5. Revenge is Planned,,,

Lauren realized just how good of an actress Luna was. She looked close to tears, and she actually got her hands to shake. Lauren was impressed. Lauren and Luna raised their guns at Luna, and Team RedVines attacked. They rescued Luna and surrounded Meredith and Lauren.

"Surrender your weapons and prepare to die."

"No!" Luna called from the back of the group. "They can be hostages! You guys know Brian will come running if he thinks Meredith needs help, and as I was being protected by you guys, I heard him team up with Darren."

Joe looked from Meredith to Lauren. "Surrender your weapons and duct tape, hostages." Luna walked over and took their guns and duct tape. She winked at them and turned to Joe.

"Let's set up base in the kitchen!" Joey suggested. "So we can get snacks!" Joey led the way. Luna stood in the back with Meredith and Lauren, pointing a gun at them. As they walked, Luna filled them in on the next part of the plan.

"Okay, so they are going to go attack Brian, and I'm going to watch you. Alone. Tell you the rest when we get there."

When they got to the kitchen, they kept walking, despite Joey's protests. They set up base in the living room, a room with only one door. They taped their prisoners to a couple of wooden chairs, and then prepared to go after Brian and Darren.

"Who's going to watch these two?" Joe asked. Luna stepped up to him.

"I'll do it. I feel like I'm not pulling my weight around here. I can do this. The rest of you go after Brian and Darren. I'll be fine. It's not like they can do anything." The guys agreed and set out to do battle. Luna untied Lauren and Meredith and told them the rest of the plan.

"Okay, so you guys are going to sneak out of here, taking me with you. Joe and the others will come back and try to catch you. You will be waiting, concealed in the darkness and shadows of the hallway, and then you will come out as the guys walk past. You will hold a gun to my head, I will be tied up and I will be pretending to be knocked out. Then you will tell them what happened, that you broke free and attacked me, and offer to trade me for someone else. The guys will all insist on themselves, and you will choose Joe. I will wake up then, and ask what is happening. You will tell me, and I will try to break free. You will collect Joe and I will run away. Lauren, you will follow me. I think I know where Matt and Nick are. I will run in and act scared, and Lauren, after you get to the door, wait a bit, then come in after me and "reclaim your hostage". We will meet up in the attic. Let's go." Lauren looked at Luna with a weird look on her face. "What?"

"You. How long did it take you to think of this strategy?"

Luna shrugged. "Couple days."

"That's why you suggested a Nerf gun war."

"Yup. Let's go get my revenge."


	6. Again, Luna?

Joe and the team hadn't found Brian and Darren yet, and it had been at least five minutes. He didn't want to leave Luna alone for longer than he had to. The group turned to head back to their base, only to find Luna, Lauren, and Meredith missing.

"Shit! They broke free and took Luna! We have to catch them!" Joe ran down the hall with the others right on his tail before he heard a voice behind him. "Stop! No one move or the girl dies!"


	7. ,,,And Revenge is Delivered!

Jaime, who had been sent out by Julia and Tyler to spy on Team Megagirl while Tyler spied on Team Matt and Nick and Julia spied on Team Brian and Darren, marveled at how well Luna's plan went. And at how good of an actress she was. She was playing both teams to get what she wanted. Jaime was going to intercept Luna when she was running from Lauren and offer her an idea of what to do next. The next obvious choice was who to go after. Jaime's phone buzzed with a message from Julia telling them where to meet. Jaime silently sighed and went to go meet her teammates.


	8. Teams!

Jaime listened to Julia talk, and then said her piece. "Two of the other teams have named themselves. Joey, Joe, JoMo, Dylan, and Luna are Team RedVines, Meredith and Lauren are Team Megagirl. We should name all the teams so we can talk somewhat in code. The other teams are Brian and Darren, Nick and Matt, and us. Any ideas?"

Tyler raised his hand. "The Langs are Team Lang. Brian and Darren write the music and the script, so they are Team Writers."

Julia frowned. "What about us?"

Jaime grinned. "We aren't writers and we have nothing in common."

Tyler looked at Jaime in mock surprise. "Jaime Lyn! We played the villains! You were Poison Ivy and Candy, I was Lucius, and Julia was Crabbe. We could be Team Villains!"

Julia grimaced. "That's the thing. You were both huge villain roles. I wasn't. I don't want to feel left out."

Jaime's face lit up. Tyler reached over and turned on the light that was right over her head. Julia giggled.

"We're Team Leftovers!"

Tyler grinned. "I like it! But quick question. Are we like the 'overnight-pizza-that-someone-still-wants' leftovers, or are we the 'three-month-old-probably-should-have-thrown-me-out-a-long-time-ago-icky-veggies' leftovers?"

Jaime thought. "Three month old veggies."

Julia laughed and sent Team Leftovers their separate ways.

**Author's Note: Which team is your favorite?**

**Joey, Joe, JoMo, Dylan= Team RedVines**

**Meredith & Lauren= Team Megagirl**

**Brian & Darren= Team Writers**

**Matt & Nick= Team Lang**

**Jaime, Julia, Tyler= Team Leftovers**

**Luna= In a class by herself**

**Leave a review letting me know who you want to win!**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	9. We Love Making Eeeeeeevil Plaaaaans!

Luna had a suspicion that someone was following them. Her suspicion was confirmed when she saw Jaime's eyes behind them. She told Lauren and Meredith that she needed to go back for something. Lauren and Meredith didn't argue when they saw her face. She apparently still looked upset that she had been wrong about where Matt and Nick were. She went back to see Jaime.

"Hey Jaime. What's up? I'm assuming you aren't here to shoot me, because you would have already."

Jaime stepped out of the shadows. "I have a plan that I want to share with you. You have been playing the weakling, and we need to use that to kill the others. Because they believe you are on their team, they will run to you when you scream. So I get my teammates, we go to an isolated room, you scream, I use your phone to text the teams that you were on, telling them to meet me, or you die, they don't see my teammates, we ambush them, you will too, you will have a gun, then we will find and kill the other four members. After they are dead, we turn on my teammates and kill them, then we have an old western style duel, and whoever gets shot last wins."

Luna thought about it. "So you have two teammates. Your teammates are either the Langs, Brian and Darren, or Julia and Tyler. I can rule out the Langs, because they would never accept you as a teammate, and I can rule out Brian and Darren because of that prank you played on Brian a couple weeks ago. Therefore, your teammates are Julia and Tyler. I like this plan. Assuming it works, I will take Julia, you take Tyler."

Jaime grinned. "How did you know Brian and Darren were a team?"

Luna shrugged. "I heard them team up when we started. Let's go put this plan of yours into action."


	10. Uh-Oh

Lauren and Meredith waited for Luna to come back. When they had been waiting for 5 minutes, they started to get worried.

"Do you think something happened?" Meredith asked Lauren.

"I don't know. Let's wait ten more minutes before we start to panic.

Eight minutes had passed when they heard the scream.


	11. Screams

Joey, Dylan, and JoMo were patrolling the halls, looking for Luna. They had assumed Joe was dead because they hadn't heard from Lauren. At least they had assumed until they saw his body in the attic with a dart sticking out of his head. Then they were sure he was dead. They were next to the front door when they heard a piercing scream. Luna.


	12. Surprises and Confessions!

Joey led the way towards where he thought he heard the scream. He turned a corner and literally ran into Lauren, with Meredith following her.

"You!" He aimed his gun at her head. "What have you done to Luna?"

Lauren raised her hands in surrender. "I swear I didn't do anything. I was coming to find her after we lost her."

"How did she escape?"

"Escape? Oh, right. I'm sorry to say that Luna was tricking you guys. She was working with us to get her revenge on Joe." another resounding scream was heard. Joey made as if to shoot Lauren, but JoMo pulled him away. "Shoot later. Rescue now." The five people burst through door after door to find where they thought they heard Luna, but no one was there. Joey felt his phone buzz. He pulled it out and saw he had a text from Luna. Or at least her phone. He looked around and saw that everyone had gotten the same text.

_I have Luna captive. I will possibly surrender her to you, if you come meet me in the attic within ten minutes. The clock is ticking._ The five people didn't even look at each other before racing to the attic.


	13. The Winner is Announced!

Jaime, Julia, Tyler, and Luna burst through the attic door only to find Matt and Nick. With the element of surprise on their side, they shot the Langs with no resistance. Brian and Darren ran into the room.

"That was our kill!" Darren and Brian soon were also both dead. Tyler and Julia hid, and Luna set herself up so it looked like she was cowering in the corner, but she had her loaded gun behind her back. Jaime stood over her and gave her a thumbs up. Then she heard footsteps and put on a menacing face. Just in time, too. Joey, Lauren, Dylan, Meredith, and JoMo burst in the room, guns pointed at Jaime. Jaime put her gun on Luna's head.

"Nobody move!" Everyone froze. "Put down your weapons!" They complied. "Kick them over to me." Soon Jaime had five extra guns at her feet. She picked them up. "Move away from the door." The five weaponless people followed her instructions. "Now!"

Julia and Tyler ran out of their hiding spots and shot at Luna's former teammates. Luna grabbed her gun and ran over to lock the door. She started shooting at Lauren. Once Lauren fell, she helped Jaime take out Meredith. Tyler shot Dylan, Julia shot JoMo. They all worked together to beat Joey. Jaime waited until Julia started doing her victory dance with Tyler before attacking. Luna took down Julia with one shot to the head. Tyler took a bullet to the head and a bullet to the stomach. Jaime and Luna turned to face each other.

"It's been an honor working with you, soldier." Luna stuck out her hand to shake.

"You too." Jaime shook Luna's hand and stepped away ten paces. "On three, we shoot. One, two, three!" Jaime turned and fired. Luna rolled away from the bullet, all while firing her own. One shot to the neck and Jaime was down. Luna got up, breathing hard. She lifted her gun into the air. "I am victorious! All the losers may rise and pay their respects." The 'dead' members around her got up off the floor.

Joe looked extremely confused. "Can someone tell me how she won again?"

Luna laughed. "I teamed up with you guys, then got caught by Lauren and Meredith and teamed up with them. We caught and killed you, Joe. And I got my revenge. Then I met Jaime and teamed up with her, and we killed the Langs who happened to be in here at the wrong time. Brian and Darren came barreling in at the wrong time too. Tyler and Julia hid, teams RedVines and Megagirl ran in and we shot them all. Jaime and I then turned on Julia and Tyler, then had a western style duel, which I won. Let's go get some food."

Everyone looked awed and impressed by her story for a few seconds, then followed her out of the room for food.

**Author's Note: Finally! I have a chance to advance the plot! Yay!**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	14. Favorite Songs?

After the Nerf gun war was over, Meredith, Joey, Joe, JoMo, Tyler, Dylan, Darren, Lauren, Brian, Jaime, and Luna sat in a circle around the dining table. Well, most of them sat around the table. There weren't enough chairs, so Luna sat on the table. Tyler brought up a question that no one had thought about.

"What is your favorite song that we have performed? It could be any of the songs from any of the musicals, or from Jim and The Povolos, or from us being idiots."

Meredith started it off. "I really like Status Quo. You killed it, Joey."

Joey flashed a crooked smile at Meredith. "Thanks, Mere. Mine is No Way."

Joe went next. "Dream A Little Harder. 'I want to be a cat!'" Joe looked at Dylan, daring him to say 'what'. JoMo went next.

"I really like Sango Sango. It's fun."

Tyler smiled. "I really like Holiday Club. Nice writing, Mere."

Dylan added his favorite to the mix. "Kick It Up A Notch. Reprise."

Darren grinned at the others. "That one from Twisted. A Song Is A Dick or something like that."

Lauren laughed. "You mean that two line song about being careful of men singing songs? Yeah, that was classic. My favorite is This Is The End. Brian?"

"Dark Sad Lonely Knight. Jaime?"

"Ready To Go. Luna? What's your favorite?"

Luna looked down at the table and thought. "Stutter." Joe almost choked on his coffee. "You can laugh, but I have a reason. In April, a few days before I met you, in fact, I had an... abusive boyfriend. He came up to me the day I was working up the courage to break up with him and said we needed to break up because I was being a bad girlfriend. So I serenaded him with Stutter. He never talked to me again. So thanks!" Luna smiled at Joe and kissed him on the cheek. Joe blushed.

**Author's Note: Aww...**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


	15. Meeting An Old 'Friend'

A few days later, Luna and Joe were walking to the coffee shop for their weekly coffee date. Luna was singing "Stutter" with him, staring into his bright blue eyes when she ran into the man on the sidewalk in front of her.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I wasn't-" Luna stopped mid-sentence when she saw who it was. She gave a little shriek and ran to hide behind Joe. Joe looked at her with a confused look on his face.

"What's up Luna?" Joe turned to look at the stranger. "Hey, I'm Joe. This is my girlfriend Luna, but I'm guessing you already know her based on her reaction." Joe stuck out his hand to shake. The stranger took it.

"My name is Josh. I dated Luna a few months back. We broke up, and didn't you sing me some song? Luna, what was it called? Stammer?"

"Stutter." Luna's voice came out from behind Joe. She poked her head out and Joe slowly coaxed her out of her hiding spot. She shyly stood next to Joe.

"Aw, Luna! Don't I get a hug? I've missed you!" Josh held out his arms for a hug, which Luna reluctantly accepted. Why is she acting so weird? I feel like she said something about Stutter recently. What was it? Joe thought as Luna hugged Josh.

"So when did you meet?"

"A few months ago. I think it was April."

Josh's face turned into a mask of anger. "So right after we break up, you get a new boyfriend?" Luna tried to back away, but she wasn't quick enough. Josh slapped her across the face and punched her in the nose three times before Joe could pull her away. Suddenly Joe remembered what she had said a few days ago about breaking up with an abusive boyfriend by singing Stutter. Joe hid Luna from Josh by holding her behind his back. He was now furious. He was breathing so hard, a tornado might as well have erupted from his exhaled breath.

"If you come near her again, you butt-trumpeting toasted bastard, you will have the fury of a dozen people unleashed upon you, and let me tell you, it will be hell. Now get the fuck away."

Joe pulled Luna after him towards the Starkid manor until she passed out. Josh had been wearing some pointy rings that had cut up and bruised her face. Joe carried her the rest of the way to the manor and ran inside. Meredith, Joey, Joe, JoMo, Tyler, Dylan, Darren, Lauren, Brian, and Jaime sat at the table, but they all jumped up when they saw Luna unconscious in Joe's arms.

"What happened?" Lauren asked as she tried to clean some of the bleeding wounds.

"We ran into an old abusive boyfriend. He got mad at her for moving on from him."

"We should get her to the emergency room to see if any major damage was done." Meredith ran to get the keys to her car. "I'll take Luna and Joe, the rest of you, follow in separate cars. Let's go."

The team herded Joe out the door, with Luna in his arms. Here we are again. Joe thought about how about a year ago, Luna had been stabbed by her alcoholic dad and Joe could do nothing to help her.

"Stay with me, Luna." Joe whispered to her unconscious form. He decided to reference 'The Princess and The Frog', Luna's favorite Disney movie. "I don't know what I would do without you, my Evangeline."

**Author's Note: Okay. This should satisfy you for the next week or so. I hope.**

**Hugs and Butterfly Kisses,  
The Infamous Hogwarts Jaguar**


End file.
